A blogging conversation survival guide

What would be in this guide?

What are we aiming for?
 * What is civility and do we want it? When? Why? How? (Bill/Ben conversation)
 * Offering a resource - putting something out there to chew on

Why are these competencies important?
 * Blogs and MSM are showing up in a new ecosystem together and we have a lot to learn
 * Blogs are being applied in many different settings
 * To build community, understanding
 * To draw those into public conversations that they would not otherwise participate in (or withdraw to a walled, private garden.)
 * To be able to engage people in authentic conversation about things. Would like to be able to talk to people I don't agree with. Want to stay away from being frustrated saying I'm ok, you're a jerk. Too easy.
 * If we are going to get along in this world... don't see an alternative. Online and everywhere. Learn how to talk to each other in a cafe, in a school board meeting. Something to be learned that is transferrable. The blog world opens up the possibility of enormous interaction, express oneself in a way not able to do elsewhere. Michal Shibon. Everytime I have written something important it has put me at risk." (GET ACTUAL QUOTE).
 * Be responsible for your own behavior. If you have a strong point to make, make a lot of energy, don't be surprised if people say ouch. Should you care that they say out? ALl depends?
 * How to apologize and talk about it
 * The human conversation is essentially improvised.
 * If people can articulate on why they don't agree vs name calling.
 * Impact on big media world
 * Role in civil society, democracy, etc.
 * Do we understand what peer to peer communication and media is online?
 * Handling hecklers
 * Setting and managing expectations
 * In some settings, flame creating behavior is desired and rewarded

What are the practices
 * it is not easy
 * it takes a personal investment of our time to do this thoughtfully (so what about one -offs and drive bys?)
 * articles culled from our del.icio.us tags?
 * a page for each perspective : civility, who gives a shit, dynamic conditions, blah blah blah
 * We don't know who "is in the room" in a blog conversation
 * community response and over response
 * yin and yang
 * I come with an agenda, fully defended, with different shields - I have to look at my own scripts. Self reflection.
 * PRinciples we each have
 * The kinds of strategies and behaviors that we discover that work better than others. Not like we have the "how to be a great parent book" written here.
 * Work not to project our issues on to another person that we disagree with
 * Ben and Mena - they threw bullshit vs the deeper issues. Put down our shields first.
 * Legitimacy of coming with an agenda ... and not have that close down conversation.
 * Being undefended vs. defenceless. TO be vulnerable to be unvulnerable. It hurts sometimes.
 * The right measure of detatchment.
 * Willingness to take risk and not knowing what will happen.
 * Conversation in a world where you may not know whom you are talking with. Asbestos jammies.
 * What do you do when a blog vigilante group descends on your blog?
 * How not to set ourselves up (victim-like behavior, come on, come and get me)
 * How to use comments (open, close, moderate, responding)
 * (I'm noting three sets of competencies: writing, commenting and responding to comments)
 * Watching for why you do something: the rush or the connection and communication?
 * Differences between different blog arenas; big media, work, personal, etc.
 * You get what you ask for? What are you asking for? Really?
 * Anonymity - anonomous commentors and their influence in blog conversation dynamics.
 * Legal issues: libel laws
 * Blog guidelines that we post on our blogs
 * Our willingness to be transparent about our processes
 * Our willingness to be transparent about our processes

 Stories, Examples, Links, Pointers
 * Examples from mommyblogging (man saving underwear!)
 * Examples from politics
 * Examples within a business setting
 * Examples from a social setting
 * Just inside the blogging community or outside? The Washington Post thingie? When they turned off comments. Panel on ethics and interactivity that followed. Oriented towards big media. Not seeing themselves as part of a bigger community.
 * Tish, istalaunching experience?
 * Koan, Blogher Amber experience?
 * Marcom/PR

 Rich Resource Materials
 * Would anyone like to go through the SXSWPanelPrep delicious tags and create a shorter, annotated set of resources?  By March 24th - Grace
 * EFF Libel/internet materials
 * Safe blogging guidelines (context specific - not uniformly useful across all kinds of blogs)